You Make Me Sick

There is one thing that I fail to understand. What's with people telling the whole world about their ibadah? Bukankah lebih afdhal buat ibadat diam-diam, sendiri-sendiri, tak perlu tak cakap pada orang. Solat tahajud ke, tadarus ke, puasa sunat ke, anything! You keep them to yourself. You don't broadcast these things to people. If you really want to do it, sincerely want to perform ibadah, you don't post them for all the world to see. Why is there the need to tell? Is it some sick psychotic need of theirs to have people know and acknowledge how religious they are? Or is it that they are fishing for compliments for being so pious? That is a kind of mental sickness too, you know.

And it's funny because these people tend to be the first to judge other people's morality. Just thinking of it makes me sick to the stomach and it really makes me wanna puke. Hey! You are fasting, praying, whatever. Great! Good for you. Now try shutting up. Keep it to yourself, won't you? Your relationship with God is your business. Seriously. Nobody else should know. There are so many more people out there who do so much more than what you are doing, and they don't talk about it. Because they sincerely do it with all their heart. Not for show.

Gosh. Seriously. Sickening.

The Memories

It's funny how you don't realize how much you miss someone until you find yourself keep looking at the same pictures over and over again. They are the same photos, same album, same folder, and yet, every time you look at them a smile would spread across your face, and sometimes a small laugh, as the pictures take you back to those places, those memories.. The jokes, the laughs, the thoughts shared together, the expressions on each others' faces... They all make up the whole entire album. Behind each photo lies thousands of uncaptured keepsakes, all that would come rushing back to the memory as the picture came to view. You find yourself longing for those moments where nothing else matters. There are times you could sit and stare at one picture forever, as one after another wave of recollections come bashing at your thoughts. You could tell the story to someone, just to share, because those memories have been unintentionally summoned and they just won't go away. But people won't understand. They smile, they laugh when it gets to the funny part, and sometimes they just nod a couple of times as a nice gesture, for those memories that they do not share, they do not appreciate. You get lost in the memories as the words flow from your mouth, your face animated with excitements, but those who would truly treasure those memories as much as you do are just too far away to share those precious thoughts.. And you find yourself back in reality, apologizing to your companion for getting carried away, and you keep the rest of the story to yourself, swallow back those words that was about to escape your mouth just a few miliseconds before you were snapped and forced to return to the present. As you lie your head to sleep, they come haunting you again, keeping you awake till the wee hours of the morning, leaving you with an incomprehensible longing...