Ku Ingin Selamanya

Buat tunang tersayang..Eceh.. haahahahahaa...





Ungu – Ku Ingin Selamanya

Cinta adalah misteri dalam hidupku
Yang tak pernah ku tahu akhirnya
Namun tak seperti cintaku pada dirimu
Yang harus tergenapi dalam kisah hidupku

Ku ingin slamanya mencintai dirimu
Sampai saat ku akan menutup mata dan hidupku
Ku ingin slamanya ada di sampingmu
Menyayangi dirimu sampai waktu kan memanggilku

Ku berharap abadi dalam hidupku
Mencintamu bahagia untukku
Karena kasihku hanya untuk dirimu
Selamanya kan tetap milikmu

Di relung sukmamu
Ku melabuhkan s’luruh cintaku
Di hembus nafasmu
Ku abadikan s’luruh kasih dan sayangku


p/s: I would very much like to have this song played on my wedding... :)

S & H- the perfect combo

H is fast asleep at home...I wish I can creep into that tiny bed, as he calls it, and lie beside him... One day, very soon, I will be able to do that.. :) I'm still trying to imagine us living in our house in Nilai, waking him up for sahur.. and then come Hari Raya driving down south and flying up east coast. To have him by my side when I close my eyes and to see him first thing the moment I wake up each morning. I have been wishing for that.. It's about time it happens. ;p

Six years ago, it didn't cross my mind i'd find my soulmate. Someone who is always there, someone who never fails to love and support and cherish me for the person I am. Someone who drives me crazy with his mood swings and yet, still I can't stop loving him for the person he is, the person he makes me, and the person I am when I'm with him.

He never fails to hold my hand when I cry, even though in between the soothing and calming he somehow manage to insert some kind of scolding (he does, truly, drive me crazy), and yet life without him is quite unimaginable. Life without his warmth and smile? I would actually go crazy.

We have a way of making each other laugh.. We'd giggle and snicker at our private jokes.. I can already imagine our giggles late into the night in the Nilai house. It being a new house, and me not familiar with it yet, I'd most probably drag him downstairs just to get a glass of water. (If you think I'm brave, you're wrong.)

I'm a messy person, but I can't stand a dirty place. H's standard of clean, is a little lower than mine, but he's a neat freak. So I guess I'll be doing the cleaning and he'll be doing the tidying. With our hectic schedule, I certainly hope the house will be in livable condition. If it gets too messy we can always go to my mum's house.. or his mum's house... or even nana's house. Hihihihiii...

I always treasure our quiet discussions of the house, what it will be like and what we'll do to each room. The playful arguments of how I want the study to remain as it is while he won't hesitate to turn it into baby's room..

There's always something to share with each other at the end of each day.. H would have his stories of Teh, and RB and KABA's bickering plus stupid sites and stupid clients.. I'd spill my version of how the day sucks.. It took me quite a while to get him to talk and share. He used to think he is the superhero who needs to keep everything bottled up inside, suffer in silence kind of person. Now, he can't stop spilling.. and I'll always be the faithful listener, nodding and smiling, laughing when it gets to the funny part. Somehow funny parts of the stories usually involves Teh and some gross things. Now Teh is gone, H is insanely busy and all stressed out. Less funny stories, more cursing. Hehe..

Well..That's us, in a nutshell. :) This journey will continue, as we grow and learn, individually and together. One thing remains though, we're quite perfect for each other. I really do think so. ;)

August ramblings

Hmm.. For some reason, all of a sudden, out of nowhere, i feel touched by the way H kept adressing me as "sarah sayang" in his blog..

Anyway, about a week ago, i saw a girl carrying a Coach handbag and also for some reason i have yet to figure out, that sent me into a short depression period. I have always considered myself to be more successful than she is, because i believe i have put in more effort in my work than she did. I know H hates it when i say things like these..but I can't help it sometimes. Yes, I do believe in rezeki. And I don't believe i am intellectually superior than her. I just think my continuous effort and unwavering focus in my career has put me one level above. It is from hard work. Coach is not even my thing. I used to wish for it back when I was still studying, but I grew up and realized my taste in bags is different than what Coach offers. So I'm left dumbfounded, no idea why the sight of her carrying the Coach bag is affecting me in such a way. What kept running through my mind was, she can have what she wants, and I can't. I worked like hell for the past 4 years and I can't afford the bag that I've been wishing for, but she can. I do believe it's not so much of having-a-designer-bag issue. It is more of a I-can't-have-what-I-want-and-she-can kind of thing. Not sure if this makes any sense to anyone else, but, it makes a lot of sense to me. Yeap, I can have whatever I wish for if I ignore my priorities. The designer bag I've been eyeing for more than a year, I have been able to afford it for quite some time. But i have my priorities. I'm getting married very soon, so every single penny that can be saved goes to 'wedding fund'. On top of that H and i just bought a house. Our very own house... So every single penny that can be spared goes to 'house fund'. What's left is not much. It sucks when I look around and see other people spending on anything they feel like. If it's a designer bag they want, it's a designer bag they get. If it is expensive makeup they desire, expensive makeup they get. Yes, true, I am not drowning in credit card debt and for that I am truly thankful. But at the same time this is what my life has been like from the first day I started working. Conditions have improved, but I am still nowhere near that state where I can carelessly spend on anything I like. I literally work day and night, so even though I kept telling myself I'll have a nice house at a considerably young age and that I do not have to worry about credit card bills, the reality is, every time I look around, people are getting what they want and I don't. THAT is depressing like hell.
But there is something I have always silently bragged about..having H. :) I have seen other people's bf/fiance/husband.. Although I feel bad for feeling this way, I can't help smiling in pride with who I have by my side and at times, I even feel sorry for the other girl, because the person sitting next to her is a jerk or a loser. There's this one very sweet and nice girl i know whose fiance insulted my job, right to my face. I do not have to prove myself to him, because I know, and for god's sake everyone who knows our field would know that my job is superior to his, so I let it slip. As for that girl, she has my deepest sympathy.
Name me a guy who remembers history like H does. Name me a guy who reads so diligently like H does. He's like a walking encyclopedia. We once had a conversation about the mechanics of a type of watch, how it uses pressure to determine altitude. I can hardly recall 1 name that I can have that conversation with, other than H. Yes, I'm a geek, I can only survive dating a geek. Can you imagine watching nat geo and having someone by your side who is ready to answer any question you have? It's amazing! Ngeeee...

Mesti la tunang saya bes kan, dah nama pon tunang saya. Muaahahahahaa...